April is the 15th anniversary of my blog, so I will be sharing previous posts this month from over 2000 that I have written. Today, we're revisiting a post from November 2015 when a conversation made me think twice.
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I was thinking about the title of my blog last night and how we learn throughout our entire lives. I thought I'd start sharing some of the things I've learned through living. I think you'll find most of these lessons are not unique to me, but things we all figure out one way or another.
The first: "Don't assume you know what others are thinking."
We observe others, and from their actions, we assume we know what they're thinking. The problem is that we bring our perspective to the situation, which can be different from that of the other person. Sometimes, this leads us to the wrong conclusion. This happens even in what seems to be the most obvious of situations (especially with kids).
Here's an example:
When Wally was a toddler, he loved yogurt and applesauce mixed together. We'd give him a bowl, and he would quickly gobble it down. I was happy that he enjoyed this healthful snack. A recent conversation with an adult Wally, however, revealed that all was not as it seemed. It turns out that Wally liked applesauce but not yogurt so much. He kept eating because he was trying to see where the applesauce went. He said he was always disappointed because he never found it.
Wow. That was a surprise. I had never thought about the concept of mixing, and when kids understand that. I just thought he liked applesauce mixed with yogurt. I was wrong.
This example helps me think twice before I judge what others say and do. When someone says or does something that I don't understand, I try to remember that maybe there's something going on that I don't know.
Have you ever been surprised when you learned the background behind what someone has said or done?
The first: "Don't assume you know what others are thinking."
We observe others, and from their actions, we assume we know what they're thinking. The problem is that we bring our perspective to the situation, which can be different from that of the other person. Sometimes, this leads us to the wrong conclusion. This happens even in what seems to be the most obvious of situations (especially with kids).
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| An applesauce-lovin' Wally (with wild hair) |
Here's an example:
When Wally was a toddler, he loved yogurt and applesauce mixed together. We'd give him a bowl, and he would quickly gobble it down. I was happy that he enjoyed this healthful snack. A recent conversation with an adult Wally, however, revealed that all was not as it seemed. It turns out that Wally liked applesauce but not yogurt so much. He kept eating because he was trying to see where the applesauce went. He said he was always disappointed because he never found it.
Wow. That was a surprise. I had never thought about the concept of mixing, and when kids understand that. I just thought he liked applesauce mixed with yogurt. I was wrong.
This example helps me think twice before I judge what others say and do. When someone says or does something that I don't understand, I try to remember that maybe there's something going on that I don't know.
Have you ever been surprised when you learned the background behind what someone has said or done?
Until next time...
Maybe our prejudices and the way we grew up hinders our judgement of people. Some people aren't good at expressing themselves so they do it in ways not easy to understand and cause people to assume things that aren't true. Is this why people like watching behind the scenes of movies and shows because it reveals things that people don't understand.
ReplyDeleteHave a lovely day.
My kids really opened my eyes to basic differences among people because they processed the world very differently than I did.
DeleteInteresting comment about behind the scenes movie footage. I find them interesting, but sometimes I don’t want to know how the magic was made because it ruins things for me.
This is hilarious. Don't assume, indeed!
ReplyDeleteAll sorts of interesting things have been coming out recently about Wally and Theo's early years. Wally told me yesterday about how he figured out how to defeat the "child-proof" handles on the doors.
DeleteWe have had similar conversations with our kids. I'm sure that there will be further revelations as time goes on.
DeleteAw, that's sweet that Wally ate the yogurt to see where the applesauce went. It's very easy to make assumptions based on our own experiences and perceptions, isn't it? I'm guilty of assuming things, myself, and getting into trouble as a result! Trouble which could have been avoided if I had asked some questions without assuming things!
ReplyDeleteI think that's key--asking questions when we don't understand something. I try to remember to do that, but don't always succeed.
DeleteI try not to assume, but I do. I love Wally's hair!
ReplyDeleteWally was pretty much bald until he was two. Then his hair came in curly and everyone assumed he was a girl.
Deletewe don't get much glimpse into another person's life. We haven't read their back story. We don't know the plot. We don't know the characters or how any of it will end. Maybe we get a paragraph.
ReplyDeleteThat’s a good way to think about things that we usually don’t get more than a paragraph of someone’s story.
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