Thankful Sunday

Happy Father's Day 

I am thankful for my father and Ward. 

My father and mother, and my oldest sister, who first made them parents.
My father was home on leave from the army in this picture.

My father didn't have the easiest time growing up. After some setbacks, his father became an alcoholic to deal with his troubles. My father was the oldest boy and was often the brunt of my grandfather's bad moods. However, he made the dysfunction stop with him, and he provided a stable and loving home. And for that, I am thankful.*

Ward is a good father to Wally and Theo, and for that, I am thankful. It has made my job as a parent much easier.

 Here is an interview I did with Ward a few years ago about his thoughts on being a father.

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Ward is a great father, so I thought I would interview him this Father's Day to get his perspective on the important job of parenting.  I didn't time things very well and waited until he was in the middle of a work project to talk to him. Oops! I very kindly thank him for the time he was able to give me during my interruption.

Tell me about being a father. 

Newborn Wally.
This is when the doubts began.

It's spending your life not being sure what you are supposed to do. How much do I help my kids? How much do I protect them? How much do I give them? How much do I let them fail to learn? Even now that Wally and Theo are adults, I still worry about those things.

As you mentioned, Wally and Theo are now young adults. What do you see when you look at them?
I see responsible, kind people who can have an intelligent conversation and who know how to handle disappointment. Also, I see good drivers, and I am thankful that all of that stressful time of teaching them how to drive seems to have paid off.

Even though you were unsure of what you were doing, you have successfully raised two boys to adulthood. What advice do you have for new dads? 
I'm not sure. I still don't know if I have parenting figured out. But I'll give it a try. Educate yourself, but also use your common sense. Spend time with your kids and let them learn from your examples.

But here's something that Wally said the other day that may be the real key to successful parenting. He said that the best thing we did as parents was to keep trying. We'd try one thing to solve a problem, and it wouldn't work. And then we'd try something else, and it wouldn't work. We'd try another thing, and it wouldn't work either. But finally, we'd try something, and it would work! He is very grateful for the many times we didn't give up when it would have been a lot easier. So for new dads, I'd say, just keep trying.

Thanks. Next time, I'll make an appointment, and we'll have another conversation about some of the details of raising Wally and Theo.

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*Of course, my mother was an important part of this equation.

Until next time...